“Hop up out the beddddd...turn my swag on…”

“I am in missseryyy!”
Snooze.
“And ain’t nobody who can comfort me. Oooh Ohhh!”
Snooze.
“Why won’t you answer me?!”
Snooze.
“The silence is slowly killing me.”

Ok, ok. I’m out of the bed.
And start getting dressed for the school I do dread.
Buzz buzz My blackberry vibrates
It’s my TFA friends, ensuring me that, “Today will be great!”
I reply with a smile and tell Laura the same
Only to realize I’m running late! SHAME!
In my car, I’m speeding down the road
Passing “sleeping” carcasses, roadkill overload

I made it! I made it! With a minute to spare
My school should have a sign that says, “Enter if you dare”
“Good mornings and hellos” is what you’ll hear from me
Moans, groans, and necks rolls is what I usually receive

Ding ding And playing school begins
“Today’s gonna be great!” I try to convince myself again
As the kids yell and race down the hall with great speed
I’m standing at my “duty post” bracing myself for the stampede

“Stop running! Go to class! Where are you supposed to be?!”
“Shut the f*ck up! I know dat teacher ain’t talking to me.”
Explicatives are heard and quarrels and fights are witnessed
Come on 7:45, so I can get down to my teaching business

Finally 1st period begins;
I take a deep breath, “Well. Here we go again.”
Fractions, decimals. Be sure to line them up.
“Miz Neb! Will you tell him to shut up!!!”
“Sshh! Sshh! Remember our rules.”
“Ugh!!!! Damn. I hate this school.”
“That’s 2 writing assignments for you my dear.”
“I don’t care because I’m going to St. Joe next year!”

Translations, rotations, surface area, and perimeter
“Ugh! This is boring! We’re your smart class remember!!???”
As soon as I part my lips to respond
“Excuse me teachers! Pardon this interruption!!”
We’re holding again. Awesome! The 3rd time this week.
I look around the room. Trying to think of the words to speak.
I finish the lesson and assign their homework.
“Mane! She da only teacher dat do dat! She a jerk!”

Scene.

On to 2nd period, the one with the inclusion teacher
I’m standing in the back, watching him review the Bell Ringer
Speechless I am. His answer is incorrect.
I’m thinking to myself, “OMG! What the heck!?!?”
Fast forward 15 min, and what do you know?
Another announcement interrupts, telling us it’s time to go.

“Ok class. I guess we’ll pick this up tomorrow.”
As class is dismissed, my heart slowly fills with sorrow
How am I supposed to teach all this by May
When we hold or miss class every, other day!??!

I glance down the hall and nod towards my TFA colleague
She shakes here head, rolls her eyes. Silent sympathy.

Scene.

The rest of the day is usually a blur.
3rd through 7th period, with lunch thrown in there.
During my planning, I’m usually the babysitter
For the absent teachers. We don’t request substitutes, go figure.

Finally 3:00! Time to go home!
Oh wait! Another announcement’s coming through the phone.
“Teachers! Teachers! You can’t leave yet.
I have several deadlines that haven’t been met!
We’re meeting in the library on today to sign papers
And you bet not miss it! Because I don’t ask for many favors!”

So to the library I go. Pissed to say the least.
Because procrastination on her part, apparently creates an “emergency” for me!
After an hour of signing mysterious documents
We’re kept another 45 to listen to her vent.
We’re belittled and threatened. And “teaching and learning isn’t happening”
We’re at risk of failing!” Which for her is very frightening.
Not for the children’s sake. But for her interest alone.
“I bet if I lose my job, I promiseee won’t be the only one going home!”

I leave the meeting, feeling jaded and confused.
The kids are misled, miseducated, and I feel abused.
I often ponder on the easiest ways to get fired.
But after much prayer, I remember why I was hired.

Despite the misinformation, frustration, and malfunction of my school,
I believe in my kids, and I want them to believe it too.
I return to the madhouse, each and every day
And sometimes look forward to seeing them and laughing at the hilarious things they say

And there are those occasional moments, when the light bulb flickers on
And huge smiles cross their faces-- the confusion is gone!
“Oh ok! I get it now! This is easy!”
Makes my songs, gestures, and chants seem less cheesy
A sigh of relief, and I return the smile
There are moments like this that makes fighting in the trenches worthwhile

We have a system and administrators that are failing our young nation
I’m here to help, but Lord knows I need much patience.
The kids are the victims, and good teachers are too
But I keep pressing towards the light and do what I have to do

Now I lay me down to sleep.
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake.
I pray the Lord my soul to take.

As I drift off in my dreams
I think of fun, engaging things
To try the following day to reach my kids
I hope tomorrow runs smoother than today did.

I’m off to sleep, without missing a beat
To take advantage of the 5 hours I have to sleep.
And unfortunately, I hate to say
That this cycle usually repeats the very next day.

Goodnight.